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For, while averting that revulsion which they found so unbearable, they also deprived themselves of those redeeming moments, frequent enough when all is told, when by conjuring up pictures of a reunion to be, they could forget about the plague. But, naturally enough, this prudence, this habit of feinting with their predicament and refusing to put up a fight, was ill rewarded. Therefore they forced themselves never to think about the problematic day of escape, to cease looking to the future, and always to keep, so to speak, their eyes fixed on the ground at their feet. “At such moments the collapse of their courage, willpower, and endurance was so abrupt that they felt they could never drag themselves out of the pit of despond into which they had fallen. Or the way someone said he loved me and then slowly changed his mind.”Īnother Vagabond Lost To Love: Berlin Stories on Leaving & Arriving ’cause I was never really well around the expectations of my personalityĪnd because I haven’t been very impressed lately. Turning off the phone and blowing out the candles so no one knew I was home. I was still the one locking the door every night. Safe behind the comfort of these four walls and a closed door.īecause as much as I tried or pretended or imagined myself as a part of all the people out there, It’s the way I thought my restless wandering was over, that I’d found whatever I thought I had found, or wanted, or needed, and I started to collect my belongings.
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The gentle moonlight slipping through my window and the sound of a lonely car somewhere far away, where I long to be too, I think. The way I lie awake, playing with shadows slowly climbing up my wall. Quit milling around the yard and come inside.” I want more seats reserved for heroes.ĭear Forgiveness, I saved a plate for you. I have told you where I’m coming from, so put it together. I tried that one time, high school, second lunch, and then again, We have had our difficulties and there are many things Is over your heart, and it is painted shut, then we are breathing If the window is on your right, you are in your own bed. You said I could have anything I wanted, but I You were crying too,Įven more hysterical. We were inside the train car when I started to cry. This doesn’t look that much different from home,īut then I noticed the black sky and all those lights. To the little room with the broken faucets, your drawings, all your things, I arrived in the city and you met me at the station, My hands looking weird, my face weird, my feet too far away. In the airportīathroom’s gurgle and flush, bathed in a pharmacy of In the back of the car as the lights go by. Standing by the window in a yellow towel, only twenty minutes awayĪll the rooms of the castle except this one, says someone, and suddenly Lived here, sorry about the scene at the bottom of the stairwellĪnd how I ruined everything by saying it out loud.Įspecially that, but I should have known.Ī phone ringing, and when you open your eyes you’re washing up Hello deer.Ī car crash sound as the trucks roll over and explode in slow motion.
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Inside your head you hear a phone ringing And yes, I swallowįor the record, let me make a thing of cream and stars that becomes, I sink the boat of love, but that comes later. I walk through your dreams and invent the future. I can tell already you think I’m the dragon, Love always wakes the dragon and suddenly Sing lady, sing! Of course, she wakes the dragon. Love on the water, love underwater, love, love and so on. So maybe I wanted to give you something more than a catalogĭear So-and-So, I’m sorry I couldn’t come to your party.ĭear So-and-So, I’m sorry I came to your partyĪnd left you bruised and ruined, you poor sad thing.Ī forest, then. You will be alone always and then you will die. Every morning the same bigĪnd little words all spelling out desire, all spelling out Every morning another chapter where the hero shiftsįrom one foot to the other.